When we follow our dreams...

...we toss a pebble into the world. Creating a beautiful ripple of inspiration.

Before and During!

I am finally getting the courage to post my before and during photos. Note, I am not calling them before and after because I am not "there" yet. But after a 175 lb loss in one year, the results are worth sharing.

A BIG thank you to all of my friends, family and supporters, as well as my fitness/wellness team led by Leif Anderson, with Sandra Swami and Julie Gronquist from Balance for Life Fitness Center. My FN 2 family. And of course, the one and only O'Neal Hampton - my light, mentor and friend whose story and courage gave me the strength to get off the couch and change my life.

I love you all and am forever grateful for the support I have received along the way.

Celebrating & unpacking the emotion behind the big pants

Last weekend I had the chance to "hang" with my FN 2 gal pals and our program director, Leif Anderson, in celebration of our one year FN reunion at Surfside on Lake Superior. This is where it all went down and my life began to change - for real and forever.

It was a wonderful anniversary filled with laughter, stories about dragging our butts out of bed to workout at 5:30 a.m. and pushing ourselves past what we thought we were capable of. We had a "real" discussion about where we each are today. Shari and I were among the first to hit the -100 lb mark and are mirror images of our former selves. Sue and Carrie made major personal life changes and both got to a weight they were comfortable with - now struggling to maintain. All of us are happier and smarter about our health, and - best of all - we're incredibly close friends.

The weekend was just the kind of pause and celebration needed. We climbed our mountain, took photos with our big pants, and got some quality time with each other and Leif. We drank champagne and toasted our success. And, we had time for "real" talk about the challenges we all face moving forward. Challenges ranging from love/boys, to how to live in maintenance, to bumps in the road that challenge our strength to stay the course, to skin issues after significant weight loss, and more. I feel truly blessed to have this group as part of my inner circle and I am so grateful for the opportunity to share the journey. Shari, Carrie and Sue - I love you.

Unpacking the emotion behind the big pants
The celebration weekend was the first time I pulled out my big pants and these photos are the first of me with the big pants - one year after my journey began. Wow, is right!

This past week, I have been thinking a lot about those big pants and how it made me feel to stand up in front of the world and hold them up in a photograph for all to see. I have to admit, that while the majority of what I feel is pride, success and accomplishment - there is a small part of me (a voice in my head) that wonders how I got there. That part of me feels embarrassment for having gotten to a place where I wore pants that now two normal people can stand in.

As I unpacked those feelings of embarrassment (and maybe a tiny bit of shame), I remembered what my mentor and friend O'Neal Hampton said on the first night of our boot camp: "Don't spend time thinking about how you got here...because you will stay stuck. Instead, focus your energy on moving forward and changing your life...to focus on the past keeps you stuck in the past..." Or something like that. (I am sure O'Neal said it much more eloquently as an O'Nealism I have grown so fond of, but the sentiment is there!). 

O'Neal is absolutely right! I don't want to stay stuck in the past or give it any credence. So I am acknowledging that it is there by putting it out into the blogoshpere and moving on. The truth is, I couldn't be happier with where I am today; and the journey to get here - well, it's been truly amazing. I wouldn't change a thing. Look at me! :-) But, I did need to stop and listen to that voice of embarrassment with a touch of shame over my pants and try to unpack it for myself.

In doing so, I have realized that this is the very voice that will keep me from getting back to the size I was. And as I stand up with those pants in a photo or on the road in front of lots of people and pay it forward, it is the size of those pants that empowers me to help others. They not only show how far I have come in one short year, but also let others know they too can outgrow (shrink) their pants. It is not only possible. It is VERY doable.

So I will keep those big pants around and hold them up next to the new me and feel empowered not embarrassed. Not only are they are a stark reminder that I will never go back there, but they may provide "hope" to others to know they, too, can do it.

For now, the pants are back in the drawer. But I can't wait to hold them up when I get to my goal and I will proudly display the photo with two of me in them. Yes, those pants are empowering. And that's how I will look at it moving forward.

I am a lucky girl to have had the courage and determination to get off the couch after nearly 30 years of being obese and sedentary to make a life-altering change. I did it! And if that is not empowering, I don't know what is.

Lori

A bran new day

Today marks the celebration and one-year anniversary of my Fitness North experience. One year ago today, we were coming into the home stretch of our two week live-in experience, anticipating our final weight loss numbers (I lost 21 lbs while on campus) and considering what it would be like to live in the real world.

As I watched the sun come up over Lake Superior this morning, I was struck by the beauty and opportunity of a new day. A clean slate. A fresh start. A new perspective. Anything is possible at the start of a new day. And I realized the analogy is perfect for where I am in this journey and in my life - I am celebrating a bran new day.

Weighing in this morning at a total weight loss in my one-year journey of -175. Feeling very proud of that number but more importantly of all of the accomplishments -- both physical and emotional -- to get here.

Yet I am careful to take note of the fact that it has not been a straight line to get here, but rather an up and down hilly and windy road that has made the victory over obesity and a sedentary life all that much better. The bumps and curves in the road have each provided a lesson. Those lessons (and there is a future blog in each one) have helped me better know myself and will most certainly help me hold this new life when the going gets tough in the future. And we know it will.

From hormones and life changes, to changing personal relationships, to work stress and the trials and tribulations of building a business, to weeks of plateaus, to surprising nutritional plans that play with the mind and remind me I am not in control, to family challenges, people drama, to the trials and triumphs of re-entering the dating market, and more! Whew, what a ride.

Through it all, I have learned:

• I am capable of absolutely anything! Anything, and everything.
• Life is soooooooo much more fun when the glass is half full and viewed through the possibility lens (this is how I am built, but I lost this optimism somewhere along the way under those 175 lbs)
• We need people - the lions in our den - to support us along the way. There is no way that I could have done this without the love, support and encouragement of hundreds of people.
• I cannot control other people or life circumstances, only how I react to it and hold it and that makes ALL the difference.
• The answer always lies within me (you) - sometimes you have to stop and listen to find it.
• Life is way more fun as an active and healthy person. Everything seems easier, brighter, richer.
• O'Neal was absolutely right: Connecting those 18" inches from  your head to your heart is the key to success. Our minds stop us long before any physical limitations do.
• I am a fashionista, bar none - and love, love, love fashion, style, clothes, accessories, trends...
• When you go through a major life change and a journey like this, you will find out who your true friends are - hold them close. They really matter!
• We are not perfect. Our bodies are not perfect, even when at goal. 
• Some part of my life going forward WILL include helping others who struggle with obesity, helping them see a light at the end of the tunnel and find the courage to take that first step. To be whole, I must pass this on and I can't wait!

Today, I get to see my girls! There were four of us who lived together on campus and shared every part of the Fitness North journey and have remained friends all year long. I adore them. I can't wait to see them and to celebrate where we are, who we are, and how we got here. More on our reunion soon.

To ALL of my Fitness North 2 family - thinking of you today and wishing we could all be together. To anyone looking for help to take that first step, email or PM me.

Lori

The people side of the journey

Mom and I Thanksgiving weekend 2011.

I am swimming in blog topics this morning and finally chose this one after a Facebook message from my Mom and my experience at the gym yesterday inspired me.

One of the most incredible things about this journey has been how people respond. 99% of it is good...in fact, amazing. But there is some tough stuff too. Let's start with the amazing!

From the very first day I blogged, and as I packed to head up to Fitness North boot camp, people have overwhelmed me with support and encouragement. Much of it has come from expected places. My close friends were there - Jimbo, Kate, Dennis and Jolita, and so many others. My college sorority sisters have been truly amazing, and the Marketing that Matters team with Jodi at the helm, equally amazing. Some of it though is unexpected. One of the unexpected surprises was how enthusiastically and aggressively each and every one of my family members wished me well - many of them encouraging me every day of the boot camp with cards and facebook posts, etc. I have not always felt this kind of enthusiasm for my accomplishments from my family, so this was an extra special blessing and it makes me so happy.

Throughout the last year, there have been many more positive surprises. Acquaintances on Facebook, former colleagues, more distant relatives -- all reaching out, some on a regular basis with cheers, kudos, and just general admiration. When the Fitness North story was published in the Star Tribune and I was on the cover of the Variety section - nearly 200 people personally contacted me by phone, email or Facebook. Most I knew, but many I did not. Yesterday, after my workout at Balance for Life, one of the trainers came up to me to congratulate me on my success. Last week at Balance for Life, it was another client who just raved about my transformation. Complete strangers who have only watched me from afar.

Lions in the Den
O'Neal Hampton told us the eve of our fitness camp experience, that indeed we would need lions in our den to support us along the way. I shared that story with my sorority sisters and they have "roared" for me all this past year - sometimes in a very fun and joking fashion, which of course encapsulates why I love them so much! My friend Jimbo, every step of the way, totally there. And so many people on Facebook who swoop in and comment, encourage and surprise me with their consistency following the journey and providing ongoing support. Some I suspect have had weight loss challenges of their own. Others may be inspired by the story of personal triumph.

Perhaps this is why NBC's Biggest Loser is such a hit. It's about overcoming the very thing that has eluded us; the most difficult to overcome. For me, and for the BL contestants, it is a battle with obesity. But don't we all have something that we battle? To see personal triumph in its raw reality - the good, the bad, the ugly - is inspiring. It makes people believe they too can do it.  And I am here to tell you - YOU CAN DO IT! And I will help you.

Paying it forward - helps others. Their success feeds your success.
The other really cool thing about putting yourself out there and sharing the journey in a more public way, is the opportunity to "pay it forward" and the number of people you can help...just by walking the walk every day. This is my favorite part.

I have not been afraid to expose the personal or emotional side of the journey because I believe there are thousands of people (millions actually) just like me who are struggling with the same issues. Feeling as lost, distraught, lonely and hopeless as I did. I know that if I can do it, they can do it. And, I am someone who has always hoped to change the world in some positive way. Perhaps this is my way...and my time.

If sharing my story as a compulsive eater who ate to deal with stress, hurt, worry, and literally "stuffed" emotions in an attempt to protect myself from a sometimes harsh world...if that helps you or anyone struggling with obesity in any way, then hooray! And if admitting to the world that I am less than perfect and opening up about the emotional side of this journey can help another overcome similar struggles or feel less alone, then woooo hooooo...it's a no- brainer.

I want everyone I love, and everyone in this country struggling with the disease of obesity to know that they too can beat it. They can change their health and thus their happiness quotient one day at a time. Just like I did. In fact, whatever your challenge or struggle, I now believe personal triumph is possible. I am living proof. And, not only possible, but perhaps easier than you think! Look for a light - for a ray of hope. For a helping hand. I had almost given up hope and then I found a light in O'Neal Hampton and his personal story, and with his encouragement, I took a leap of faith. Wow, did it work. (More on this in future blogs.)

Every day I hear from people in my life - some I know and some not - that my story has inspired or helped them in some way. Every day. I talk with people on the phone, via email/PM and I meet with people who want help. It feels sooooooooo good. Amazing! And it helps me stay focused on my program, too. It keeps the mojo going. O'Neal Hampton has been my mentor and role model in the Pay it Forward arena. And I am excited to explore this topic further, personally and professionally. You will see more blogs about it for sure, and at some point I will announce more formalized plans for what I will do when I reach goal to "Pay it Forward." There is no question it will become an integrated part of my life. It already has.

Way to go Mom
This morning my heart leapt when my Mom sent me a Facebook message that just by being with me over Thanksgiving weekend she felt inspired and came home Monday and started a nutritional plan and stuck to it. She lost 11 lbs this week! OMG. How cool is that? She blows my numbers right out of the water. And the thing is, my Mom is smaller than I am. Although obesity runs in my family, my Mom has always been the closest to normal weight.

I am so proud of you Mom and so excited. I want to help everyone in my family find success on this journey so they can experience the health and happiness I have found this past year. It is never too late. Go Mom! We are going to look "hot" at Christmas.

The tough part of the people equation. 
I am not going to lie, there is a tough side to experiencing dramatic change and becoming a different person. Some people in your life - for reasons that have nothing to do with you - simply will not relate in a positive way. They cannot be there for you or be happy for your success, and the relationship changes. Perhaps on some level they are jealous. Or, you are a reminder of something they don't feel they can attain. Or, by you changing how you relate, it simply changes the dynamic of the relationship in a way that no longer works for them. Maybe, none of the above or all of the above. Whatever the reason, it's difficult.

For me, this has been one of the biggest hurdles this past year. O'Neal warned me about it privately and encouraged me to stay the course even when people treat me differently and relationships end or change. What I didn't expect was where/with whom it would happen. Or, the fact that sometimes people can be spiteful or outwardly harsh to cover their feelings of insecurity, fear, or whatever it is. The challenge is to stay the course and to accept that another person's behavior/perception is simply out of your control. (What, out of my control?! Crap. You mean I can't single handily change or fix it...)

The thing is, I "get it" on some level because I have been on the other side many times and had to privately work through feelings of "I want what she's got" or "why can't I have that?" Perhaps on some level comparing ourselves to others is human nature. But, for someone who lives her life centered around the people she loves, very relationship-focused, it has been the toughest thing to process. And I am still working through it.

That said, I am finding my way. And I trust this too shall pass. For some, they may come back into my life in a different way. For others, perhaps not. I must accept and acknowledge the reality of these changing relationships, process my feelings (without eating to stuff the emotion), and be open to what comes next. Okay, enough of that.

For the most part, 99% of the people part of this journey is a true blessing. Getting here has not come with me forging ahead as a lone tiger. But rather with a plethora of lions in my den, supporting me, encouraging me, and rooting for my success.
To those of you who have read my blog, messaged me on Facebook, called me, or in any way supported me through this life-changing experience, I am deeply and forever grateful. You know who you are...and, please, from the bottom of my heart, know how very much it means to me and how your encouragement has helped me get to where I am today. The truth is, we don't do it alone.

Have a great and healthy day!

Hugs.
Lori

Nutritionally sound...healthy as a horse!

Where did the phrase 'healthy as a horse" come from? Are horses really the healthiest of the animal species or how did they earn this reputation? I wonder this morning as I prepare to start another crazy, crazy busy and probably stressful business day and eat my healthy breakfast...after taking my daily multivitamin and Vitamin C&D supplement.

When I think back to where I was one year ago and prior - an emotional binge eater who ate to deal with stress, feelings, and just about everything else. And, someone who didn't know that fruit was actually a carb! (Yes, it's true.) Honestly, I am astounded at what a difference a healthy diet makes. And frankly, how easy it was/is to make different choices.

Of course, when I was obese, I had heard about what to eat and why. I read the happiness and stress-relief studies that said if you just changed your diet and ate more fruits and vegetables and took a daily multivitamin you would feel better and function better. But of course I didn't really believe it. Or, rather, just didn't do it because it seemed too hard. Getting from where I was to where the experts said I needed to be nutritionally seemed like a big hurdle. I wasn't ready.

Well, team, now I can say without question it works. Wow, does it work! I hate to pick favorite lanes in this journey to health and wellness, but I have to say that nutrition has to be 80% or more of the equation. Working out and being active, yes, burns more calories. But, if you eat the right foods, you're burning the right stuff. And you're getting your metabolism to work with you. Cool!

I got a heavy dose of nutrition 101 at Fitness North where we were taught by the best - program director Leif Anderson -- and we were forced to read labels, count fat, protein, carbs, etc. and prepare our own meals. Let me just say, I am not a cook and never have been. I was a fast-food, microwave kinda gal. I ate more processed food than one can shake a stick at. Now, of course, I am eating whole food, not processed, cooking some and loving that I FEEL so much better. Yes, I have more energy. Yes, I am more productive at work and in my personal life. Yes, I am happier -- on the inside and the outside. And no, I am still not a cook. I do what works for me.

And that is:

• Buying only the foods that are on plan and not having anything else in the house, period
• Shopping for high quality whole foods - fruits, vegetables, etc
• Embracing the whey protein - especially when I can add fruit or peanut butter in the magic bullet
• Preparing my meals for the week on Sunday and making individual containers that I can just grab and go all week long so I always have the right thing at my fingertips (I get in trouble when I don't)
• Embracing the foods in my weight loss plan from the past year that I love and enjoying them with every bite - for me that is my eggs (LOVE my eggs and egg whites/egg beaters), turkey, chicken, and veggies galore
• LOVE Ms Dash on just about everything - they have about 6 or more varieties
• Made a decision that I am never, ever going to a fast food joint (other than subway) or a drive through again...not goin' there.

So my advice to those who think they can't take positive steps toward nutrition: YES, you can! If I can do it - as much as I hate cooking and label reading and counting/math ... you can do it! Again, start with baby steps. Here are a few suggestions.

• Find what works for you and embrace it. If you don't know, try stuff and see what you like. I knew I liked eggs - I didn't realize I LOVE them and almost can't live without them. Egg beaters too.
• Once you discover healthy whole foods that you enjoy, put them in your diet to replace something that is not. I guarantee that if you have a lot of weight to lose (like me) and you make these simple changes - like I did from fast food and processed food to whole food - even at one or two meals per day, you will notice the difference.
• Always have those foods around. And, if you can swing it, don't have the other stuff in the house at all or put yourself in a situation to buy it. I have not regretted one day that I no longer go through a drive thru or to a fast food joint. Not once. In fact, it is empowering.

In a few weeks, I will hear from my doctor how my health numbers look after one year and -170 lbs. I hope/expect they will be good. For as much as I hate doctors, hospitals and all things medical, this one I am actually looking forward to because I want to know the results. I have not been sick one day in the last year. Really? Isn't that amazing. Not a cold, the flu or anything.

Anyone else have tips or success stories to share about nutritional plans or strategies that work? Would love to hear them.

Happy day.
Lori

I hate to exercise...really?!

This morning on the way to my workout, I was thinking back to pre-Fitness North days and remembering the very first time I was introduced to the elliptical by my trainer Julie at Balance for Life Fitness Center. She asked me to do two minutes on the frickin machine, and I struggled mightily. And I believe that it was level 1!

During Fitness North boot camp just one year ago, I used to watch Phil just rock it on the elliptical and I always opted for the treadmill because I had a fear of the elliptical. (Be careful what you wish for because then Leif introduced me to the Arc Trainer!) When I had to do an hour of cardio at FN, I split my time and did 30 min on the treadmill and 30 on the elliptical.

Today, I opt for the elliptical every time and have been experimenting with increased levels and speed, but consistently do 50-60 minutes at level 11. Wow, what a difference a year makes. And the Ipad has helped too - not so boring.

I am someone who hates to exercise. Or so I thought...and of course that is what I told myself prior to Fitness North. The truth is, I don't love the gym. But I am an outdoor enthusiast! And I do love to walk, hike, bike, climb mountains, snowshoe (I think), and this winter I will find out if I love skiing - either nordic or alpine. I have the best place in the world to practice on Minnesota's North Shore - at Lutsen Mountains and on the more than 400km of cross country ski trails in Cook County.

I might even put on a pair of ice skates and give it a whirl. All indications are that I would love running and I have thought about 5K and 10K races or triathlons, which my sister Kristine runs. But, I haven't tried running hard yet due to the nature of my knees and advice from trainers that may not be a good idea. Perhaps I'll try when I get to goal and see how it goes. If I pursue running now, I might injure myself and not be able to work out and I am not willing to risk that. (Did I just write that - not willing to risk not working out?!)

The fact is, I have a new found love for activity and I get a high from pushing myself to new levels and tackling new challenges.This morning after two very stressful days at work and two missed morning workouts (yes it happens), I simply kicked butt in the gym. Both on the elliptical at my hardest push and highest level, and with my trainer Sandra who worked me hard. Jumping for god's sake, me? Hmmmmmm.

So the truth is, I don't hate to exercise. I get bored in the gym. But I LOVE outdoor activity and adventure and can't wait to try new stuff. I am not an athlete (or a ballerina) so we do need to consider my lack of coordination in pursuing new activities. I also LOVE how I feel after a good workout in the gym where I push myself. Finally, perhaps most of all, I LOVE how I feel as an active person rather than a couch potato.

Many Biggest Loser alumni go on to become trainers and run gyms or health and fitness programs. Likely, not this girl. But, the lesson here for me is that being active beats being still. ANYONE and EVERYONE can find something they like to do to be active - so find what you love and do it. I think you might find, like me, that you can then no longer live without it.

It's fun to be a healthy and active person. The bonus is that you meet other active and healthy people and who knows?! On Thanksgiving Day while I was out for my morning walk on a country road, I met the cutest guy out for his morning run. After just being chased by the neighborhood dogs, I didn't hesitate to strike up a conversation and wished him luck with the dogs nipping and barking at his heels. That was the end of the encounter but I smiled the whole way back - knowing that if I had been on the couch or still in bed too lazy to get up and work out, I would not have met this really attractive healthy and active guy.

So while I am not an award winning athlete. And I don't love the gym. I am active and need to be, and that darn elliptical has really grown on me. Who knew?!

What do you like to do? If you don't know, or you re a couch potato or a workaholic like I was who doesn't leave the desk, simply try stuff and find what fits for you...and then do it. Or, find an awesome personal trainer and you'll have the accountability. That works too. Like me, you might find there is no turning back to an inactive life.


Lori

P.S. Leif if you are reading this. Yes, my check in will include a report of two missed days of cardio in one week. Ouch. But life intervened and now I am back on the horse - so to speak! :-)