No more I can't - only yes I can!

This morning my trainer Sandra said to me during a post workout stretch exercise: "Every time someone tells you that you might not be able to do something, you do it. You prove them wrong."

We laughed about how incredibly stubborn and driven I am. But the truth is, I love that about me. And this was definitely not always the case.

When I first started this journey, and in particular, when I walked into Fitness North that first week, I was full of fear and self-doubt. "I can't" was a common part of my vocabulary. In fact, I think I said it and felt it about 100 times per day. Just ask my trainer Jay Grove and the Chief and Program Director, Leif Anderson. The thing is, I was proven wrong 100 times per day.

Just as my friend and mentor O'Neal Hampton said, my head - the emotional stuff - was standing in the way of me determining what I was really capable of - or reaching my full potential.

One of the truly amazing takeaways from the boot camp experience for me, and of this journey as a whole, is that indeed I now believe that I can do absolutely anything. I know I can!

Carrying that power around with me every day is what will allow me to change the world. In fact, I think I already am...

It is so totally awesome and makes me so happy that I just had to share that today.

P.S.. I actually like the phrase President Obama coined in his last campaign "Yes we can!" I will carry that into my day and week. I hope it inspires you too. Yes, we can! Yeah.

Have a great day everyone.

Lori

How am I running a growing business and putting myself in the equation?

The answer: With a whole lot of help and support from an amazing team of people!

What a day and a week this has been! All good. In fact, amazing...and noteworthy.

Coming off my weekend celebratory mountain climb on Oberg Mountain, I had to get back to the reality of a crazy busy work life and another week of the extreme fat loss plan.

I woke up this morning wondering how to continue to balance my critical Lori time (currently consisting of 2+ hours of cardio per day and meal prep, while feeling low on energy and creativity) with the needs of a young and growing business, client demands, staff/contractor demands, volunteer projects, a looming book deadline...

The answer is - with a whole lot of help from friends, supporters and my team! This includes a fabulous trainer who stepped up this week to train and help motivate me consistently; fellow lions who have rallied to check in on a daily basis and share their progress; friends and colleagues who have lined up as walking partners for my evening cardio; and a whole lot of kick a _ _ help from a wonderful and patient Marketing that Matters team - starting with Jodi, Theressa, Terry...

In the past few days, I have received flowers and gorgeous plants (I LOVE flowers - they make me so happy), cards, daily check ins, and phone calls and messages of support from friends and colleagues from all facets of my life. Not to mention my morning jump start from my fabulous trainer Sandra Swami who decided to get creative this morning and lead me through 30 minutes of step aerobics before my cardio at 6:30 a.m.! Who dances and steps before 7 a.m. ...sober? I guess I do! :-)

The afternoon brought a fabulous business planning meeting with my professional coach Anne who suggested we meet and walk (over 6 miles) around the Minneapolis lakes! And the evening ended with a power walk around Como Lake in the pouring rain with my friend Betsy who ventured out just to support me and managed to get quite wet doing so.

This exceptional "Lori in the equation" day has totally inspired me and sparked a bolt of productivity, positivity and creativity. I am forever grateful that during this challenging week I was able to "rock it" and feed on the energy, love and support of my incredible team and so many friends. I am a lucky, lucky girl. Brimming with excitement and anticipation for the next phase of this journey. I can't wait to see what I can make happen next!

Thank you to everyone who has touched my heart and my path these past two weeks. You are amazing and I adore you! Your love and support has helped me than you know.

Tonight, I feel totally and completely blessed. And I am smiling.

HUGS!

Lori

Today the sun is shining...

The weather today in the Twin Cities is supposed to hit 77 degrees - in mid March! The sun is shining literally and figuratively today in my world.

After toughing it out through some emotional drama this week (self-inflicted), I hit my goal of losing -200 lbs (-202 to be exact) and am one step closer to reaching my goal weight. Almost there!

I wish I could tell you that the rosy, off-the-charts-positive-and-perky Lori was back. But truthfully, that's not really where I am. I am still feeling very tired of the long journey, somewhat apprehensive about what's next, and just a bit - well, unsettled, all around.

My friend and mentor, O'Neal Hampton, who has walked this path said that is totally normal and the emotion is a necessary part of the journey. He assures me I am not nuts and am right on schedule! :-) So, I honor that and sit with it awhile.

My friend and transformation coach Leif Anderson of Leif Anderson Fitness deserves major kudos for guiding me through this entire process - from the top of Oberg Mountain that first time to where I am today. Leif carved out the strategy and the customized plans that worked with my body chemistry to lose body fat, and in the process he has witnessed the good, the bad and the ugly...week after week for 15 months now! Thank you Chief. I cannot imagine walking this path without you.

To each of you who has helped me during the past days, weeks and months of this journey - I can't thank you enough! Your love, support and encouragement has raised me up when I needed it - especially as I am fighting to bring it home this next week or two. Looking forward to celebrating May 12.

In the meantime, I am sending big hugs and today I am grateful for where I am in the process. Just sitting with it. Unsettledness and all. And, of course, moving forward toward my goal in my determined and stubborn way. I WILL get this done! :-) There is no question.

Love,
Lori

Tears on the way to the gym...

Just marking this spot in the journey and asking my "lions" to support me in getting through this phase of the work. NOTE: I will not be inspirational in this blog!

I am having to fight for it pretty hard right now and I am so tired. Soooooo tired.

Fought through some major hunger pains and strong desire to go off plan last night; had to fight for the late night cardio in the gym after a long work day; and this morning had to fight through major feelings of wanting to throw in the towel when the scale was flat after all this frickin' hard work.

It was tough to get out of bed, but I admit I lost it when I got on the scale. Tears a flowing, I forced myself to get to the gym for my early morning workout only to find the gym packed and cardio machines full. Really?! So I drove to the lake and power walked my beloved Como, ran some hills and cried as the sun rose on a gorgeous day encouraging me to get over it. (I did notice the geese squawking for joy over open water and managed to say hi to the countless men walking solo around the lake as I lapped them all!) 

Gradually, things started to become clearer and I sent up a prayer for some help to continue walking the path.

Admittedly, the tears are coming pretty regularly today and I feel a bit blindsided by it all. I think am just tired. I am ready to be at goal and move on to the next phase. It has been a long journey to the top of the mountain and I just need to be there.

This week is perhaps the toughest I will have, I hope. More than two hours per day in the gym scheduled around running a business that needs me and not enough food. I am depleted emotionally and fatigued both from the week and the journey as a whole.

If the scale had gone down today after executing this plan at 110+%, I might feel differently. But to work this hard and fight to hold it all at 100+% and then have a flat scale...well, it does not make me a happy camper. Of course, I know this is about SO MUCH more than the number, but tell my head that today.

And so I put one foot in front of the other and journey into the day knowing this too shall pass. And all I can think is - are we done yet?

P.S. I have a feeling more tears and a little drama will be involved in working through this. Thanks for your love and support.

Lori

Balance for Life

Today, we had a fun photo shoot with two members of my personal-transformation team: Julie Gronquist, owner of Balance for Life Fitness Center, and Sandra Swami, my personal trainer. I adore these women, and the Balance for Life Fitness Center in Arden Hills, MN, which has been home to my personal training for the past 16 months.

My Balance for Life story actually began in October 2005 when I first emailed Julie and asked for help. Inspired by the then-new NBC’s Biggest Loser, and fed up with living a sedentary life, I conducted my first-ever online search for a personal trainer. I had never been to a personal trainer, nor had I spent much time in the gym. But, I was convinced that I needed a personal training program and the accountability to finally do something about my life-long battle with obesity.

Julie received my email on Saturday, Oct. 29, 2005 at 2:11 p.m. and before 3 p.m. I had a return email offering to help. I had carefully selected Julie and Balance for Life from a host of trainers listed on the referral website. In part, because of the name Balance for Life – I was so desperately seeking some balance in my life, and also because of Julie’s friendly, welcoming photo and bio.

I joined the Balance for Life Fitness Center and worked out with Julie as my trainer, off and on from the Fall of 2005 to Sept. 2010. At one point, I lost 50 lbs and kept it off for some time, but then reverted back to old habits. I put all of the weight back on and then some, and remember thinking at the time that perhaps -50 pounds was the best I could do and that there was fundamentally something wrong with me.

Then, I started making excuses about why I couldn’t make it to my training sessions – I was too busy, clients needed me, I was sick – all things that seemed relevant at the time, but as I look back were just excuses. My commitment and my focus waned, and ultimately, I quit.

But Julie and Balance for Life didn’t give up on me. When I reached out in Sept. 2010, after meeting O’Neal Hampton from the Biggest Loser and making the commitment to attend his fitness boot camp, Julie was there. I enlisted her help to get out of the office chair and get moving again with the goal of being in better shape for the impending two-week, live-in boot camp.

We weighed and measured my starting place. And, from Sept. 2010 to the start of Fitness North in late Nov. 2010, I trained with Julie a couple of times per week and lost 20 lbs. She also helped me prepare mentally for the boot camp by offering tips about hiking and mountain climbing, the right workout shoes and clothes, as well as hiking boots. Most importantly, she helped calm my fears and boost my confidence going into the experience. Julie's calm and supportive demeanor, dedication to me and my fitness goals, and thorough preparation helped me get ready for one of the biggest challenges of my life.

When I returned home from Fitness North, I started to train 2-3 times per week at Balance for Life and work the nutritional program laid out for me by Leif Anderson. That’s when the real transformation began. With fresh confidence and unwavering determination, as well as a laser beam focus on the goal, I was ready to roll. Julie introduced me to kick-ass personal trainer, Sandra Swami. Sandra would become my new trainer and would push me, challenge me, teach me, and not accept any crap or excuses. She did so with unwavering support and a big smile. She was direct and forthright – something I totally admired.

I will never forget the day I was emotionally blocked and my program was off, things were starting to slip. Sandra could tell immediately that I was struggling and took me outside the studio for a walk where she spoke, and I listened and cried. It was a breakthrough day. All, because she was intuitive enough to know what I needed and bold enough to step up in the moment and help me push me past the fear to imagine and embrace real success.There is no question that day was a turning point and without Sandra's intervention, I don't know if I would be standing here today weighing -200 lbs.

Sandra is an incredible personal trainer (and person) and I am fortunate to continue to train with her 2-3 times per week. She is in the trenches with me day-by-day, week-to-week basis and has helped me get in touch with my new body and learn what I am physically capable of. There are days I swear she has me working every inch of my body (which requires some crazy things). We are always working hard and having fun.

She has also pulled my hair (to get me to have my head in the right position during an exercise), pinched my loose flabby skin, held my abs so I don’t twist and turn incorrectly, stretched out an injured back, coached me through a chronic injury in my arm, tutored me through peri-menopause issues, gotten me dancing and doing step aerobics at 6 a.m., and more. She has cried with me, laughed with me, challenged me, and encouraged me to think about the new fit me. And she has done so with an energy, creativity, passion and enthusiasm that I appreciate and admire.

What's more, both Sandra and Julie have been willing to team up and work under the strategic direction of my lead transformation coach, Leif Anderson. A man whom they’ve never met! And, their commitment to me and my success through it all has been unwavering. Simply unwavering. I can't wait for my team to meet in person for the first time at my celebration party on May 12.

I have devoted a lot of words throughout this journey to both O’Neal Hampton and Leif Anderson, and they deserve it. But the truth is, Balance for Life and my personal trainers Julie and Sandra hold an incredibly special place in my heart and have been a critical part of the excavation team. Their support, skill, guidance and enthusiasm has touched me and my life in immeasurable ways. They are a large part of my success and have raised me up when I have faltered. For that, I am forever grateful.

To anyone looking for a personal training experience in an extremely well-suited, privately owned, immaculate studio with all the latest state-of-the-art equipment, group classes and individual personal training, as well as Pilate's and massage – combined with a team of skilled personal trainers that truly care about your fitness goals – I wholeheartedly recommend Balance for Life Fitness Center. Ask for Julie and tell her I sent you.

Sandra and Julie – THANK YOU for accompanying on this personal journey of transformation. I so look forward to the next chapter as a fit and active girl. Big hugs to you both!

The power of positivity

This morning I woke up on day six of my new stricter plan feeling very "hormonal." I stepped on the scale to find my weight stalled even though I am executing the plan 100% with absolutely no deviations, and I gave up chewing gum. Big sigh.

Then, I couldn't find my ipad (still can't) and was late to meet my trainer who rearranged her schedule to accommodate me by getting up at 5:30 a.m. And, it was one of those "off" training days where I struggled with some basic stuff in the gym.

And this was all in the first hour of my day.

Why am I telling you my morning itinerary play by play? (I find that so annoying when people do it on Facebook!)

Because while on the elliptical without my ipad, I had time to think. And all I could think were positive thoughts! I realized I am making a choice. I can let this day go to crap and focus on what's not right or I can be positive and focus on all of the things that are great about those very same circumstances. I can be positive and happy. Because honestly, I am. Despite those things. That's life. Insignificant little set backs that won't matter in the grand scheme.

This is a journey. A process. And that is what I absolutely love about it! So I decided to embrace it and to turn what many would say were negatives to start my day (including the old Lori) into positives.

I thought:

• It's only a number. Truth is, after more than a year working with Leif Anderson on my fat loss protocol, I KNOW my body and I KNOW that I will have weeks where despite my best efforts and execution of the plan, I will not lose weight on the scale. That's what "hormonal" means to me. Happens every so often to millions of women! :-) Temporary setback. And again, only a number. Plus, quite frankly, I am not supposed to be weighing every day. :-) Most importantly, over  time, I have learned this too shall pass and it is nothing more than the universe reminding me I am not in charge/control. Good lesson to be reminded of every so often.

• Time to be...positive. First off, without my ipad on the elliptical, I admittedly worked harder because I concentrated more on what I was doing. And, I had time to think and reflect. The result was that I cleared my mind and turned to positive thoughts and ended up writing my personal mission statement - a new mission for the new me!
  
  It's so cool. I LOVE it! And someday soon - when I get to goal - I will share it with you.The bottom line is that would not have happened had I been on my Ipad buried in Facebook or email. It's usually when we take time and free the mind that these break throughs come. And I trust I will find my ipad today.

• Inside changing to match the outside. In the one hour reflection time, I also realized that my insides are changing to match my outside. I am living life from a positive, glass half full, let's rock the world, kind of place and it feels truly amazing!
  
  When I hit snags in the road, like hormonal issues, or feelings of insecurity that come up because of how I look post significant weight loss, I am able to keep them in the perspective of the big picture (most days) and realize we all have things to learn, do and change and we are a constantly moving target. I like the person I have become on the inside as well as the outside -190+ lbs. I am thrilled with life and the opportunities before me. Yep, got some stuff to work through and new phases coming up to challenge me, but the truth is - I can't wait! And there is not one doubt in my mind that I will prevail a sexier, happier and healthier girl all around.

So while it is quite possible that many of you will find this blog particularly perky or annoying. I share it because I believe we always have a choice about how we process the bad stuff that happens in our day. Or, rather, the challenges. To be honest, while my nature is happy, passionate and full of life, it is only recently that I can say I not only believe in the power of positivity but I now get it and live it. Its immense power is a work in me and in my life!

I want it for you. And I am so excited about what comes next I can hardly stand it. Yet watching it all unfold and unveil itself, one beautiful day, one beautiful person at a time is pretty fantastic too. So I am okay with it being a process.

Have a wonderfully positive day! Know I hold each of you in my heart today.

Hugs.
Lori

"It takes a lot of courage...

...to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power." -- Alan Cohen

I post this quote this morning for all of my friends and colleagues who in the past week have decided to put themselves in the equation and transform their lives. I applaud their courage and determination to release the familiar, and I offer big cheers of support. You know who you are and that I will always be here to support you...each and every step of the way.

This particular quote is also applicable to me as I embark on a new phase of the journey and try to get my head and my insides to catch up with how I now appear on the outside. This phase of the journey brings a new relationship with myself, with boys, and who knows what else. Scary. Exciting. Can't wait!

Have a great day my friends - wherever you are in the journey. It only gets better from here.

Hugs!
Lori

How many spa appointments does a "centered" girl need in one day?

The answer - at least three if she has herself in the center of the equation!

Yes, three 60-min spa appointments at Waves of Superior Spa (heavenly), two workouts in the fitness center with a view, a walk in the freshly fallen snow along Lake Superior's shoreline, a little hot tubbing and a jacuzzi bath -- all in the same day. Ha! Not to mention a little writing on my book.

This weekend I ended up with some free time and decided to take advantage of the many perks of my North Shore gig and the fact that I worked like a mad woman last week and got out of balance.

Ahhhh. All is right with the world tonight. A good night's sleep and watch out world. This girl's got game! :-)

Being tested or opportunity to hone my skills?

Funny where life's opportunities for growth pop up and when.

After 15 months of walking the path of putting myself at the center of the equation, I am now being tested beyond belief. Everything I have learned, worked for and journeyed toward is coming up for me today as an opportunity to once again - power through, work the program, and do what I need to do.

When there is not enough of me to go around. When everyone wants/needs a piece of me. I feel that if I sleep I won't get it all done. There is no time to work out. And, I look in the mirror and wonder why I couldn't have better skin.

In these very moments, I must hold myself in the center of the equation and continue to walk the path I know to be true. I do my very best with my God given talent and reasonable time, and then I let the voices shout, people tug at my pant leg, and the work pile. Because in the end, I will be more productive, creative, strategic, happy, balanced, compassionate...for having done so. And because I believe that with Lori in the equation, it WILL all work out.

There is no question this week is difficult. I will disappoint some people. I might not get every work out in, but I will take one moment, one step at a time and stay focused on the goal. And I believe it will all work out. The gift of these times of struggle is that we truly get to practice our skills. And I am getting so great at putting myself in the equation, I think someone is trying to ratchet it up so I get even better, even stronger and can help more people by example.

Today, I take that challenge and consider it a gift that this week I am practicing and honing my skills. I have moved from beginner to intermediate to advanced at putting Lori in the equation! :-)


Anyone else struggling today?